Hipsters and grognards have completely different terrible beards.
Grognards aren't wearing their Transformers tshirt ironically.
Hipsters like the early albums, before they got commercial, not the early edition, before they got commercial.
Hipsters argue about stupid things like the definition of 'alternative'. Grognards argue about important things like the definition of 'old-school'.
Hipsters use pretentious French words like mis-en-scene and cinema verite. Grognards use pretentious French words like bec-de-corbin and glaive.
Hipsters are into irony, which is where you wear something even though you don't like it. Grognards are into nerd-rage, which is where you talk incessantly about something even though you don't like it.
Hipsters spend hours making themselves look like they just put on any old pair of clothes at random and didn't bother to do their hair. Grognards don't spend hours.
Hipsters write zines because their band fell apart. Grognards write blogs because their campaign fell apart.
Grognards know that what they're doing isn't impressing women.
(in response to this).